The process of painting has been the constant in my life, integrating body, mind, and heart. It is through this process that I find equanimity. I find self-love through the witnessing of self on the canvas. And, through this witness, I see my patterns and behaviors. Each canvas serves as a journal. They say that relationships are sometimes for a reason, sometimes for a season, for me, art has prevailed through numerous human relationships.
I used to think I kept painting because I had to . . . it is where I go when I need to escape from the suffering of life. My sensitive self-runs away to the studio to come back out and do it over and over again. Life can be harsh, but in the studio, I find an authenticity that I can find nowhere else. It can be intriguing, mystifying but I feel the truth in it. Now, I feel as if it is a treasure, not somewhere that I have to go, but that I get to go to this very special place.
Many years ago, I thought that art needed to strictly be about beauty. I now feel that art just needs to be real, expressed from the heart. And, that it is certainly not always pretty. So, it is often the pain and sometimes ugliness that finds its way to the canvas. Art creates a language that is spoken between thoughts and words, a direct knowing that serves as the lure of the becoming. It is within that lure, that a true love is found, that lasting love that prevails through time. It is a love that starts with self and expands to the universe. And, just like I tell my grandson, I love you to the moon and back.
© Copyright 2015 Mary Barr Rhodes.